Week 3 (107) - Organising Chaos

Cold opening this week, on some grainy footage from a handheld camera. We get some poorly-framed close up shots of three faces, passed around as each man takes his turn to speak.

Ambrose: "You want an explanation?"
Rollins: "You want answers?"
Reigns: "You get answers when we want to give them."
Ambrose: "But since you asked so nicely, we'll let you in on a little secret."
Reigns: "We're sick of it."
Rollins: "IFW started over two years ago, and in that time has been filled with injustice."
Ambrose: "It's clear, but you don't seem to want to see it. The roster, undeserving. The management, blind. And worst of all..."
Reigns: "The champions."
Ambrose: "The men who wear IFW gold. The most prestigious in the world today, worn by those men who deserve such honour the least."
Rollins: "Well no more."
Reigns: "We are the Shield."
Ambrose: "We are here to shield IFW from injustice. The injustice that runs rampant. The injustice that men like Vince McMahon and Ric Flair not only unconsciously permit, but actively encourage."
Rollins: "No. More."
Ambrose: "How? Why?"
Reigns: "Like I said. Your answers come when we decide to give them."
Rollins: "Believe in the Shield."
Reigns: "Believe in the Shield."
Ambrose: "Believe in the Shield. The wrongs will be righted. The righteous will be rewarded. The rewards will be dealt by our hand."
Rollins: "Rollins."
Reigns: "Reigns."
Ambrose: "Ambrose."

The video is cut off, and we're somewhat awkwardly thrown to the arena.

JR: "Well folks, I don't know what to tell you. The Shield have shed little light on the situation, but I can only assume they'll be free to return next week."
Taz: "I don't know JR, if Flair rules that those answers aren't good enough I got a feeling Cena, Orton and Angle aren't gonna be too happy! There's a lot of guys in the locker room who want to get their hands on the Shield!"
JR: "Ladies and gentlemen, a delayed welcome to IFW Surrounded. We're kicking off with the first of two title matches, it's gonna be a big night."

Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin are standing in the ring, set to defend the tag titles in what could be considered to be consecutive matches after main eventing last week's show. They're set to finally work the Heatseekers, Curt Hawkins and Lance Archer, but the challengers aren't showing up. Haas and Benjamin look at each other in confusion, when all is revealed by the omniviewer. The big screen shows Hawkins and Archer laid out amongst the wreckage of two shattered tables, both unconscious with a small team of medics nearby. Looks like the title match is off. The tag champions have seen enough and have grabbed microphones.

Benjamin: "Alright, we get it. You're back there, you're taking out tag teams. Why don't you come on out here and do what you came here to do?"
Haas: "We're not stupid, we know who you are. We're not scared, we're not hiding. Let's do this."

Wheeeee! A red pyro shoots from the lighting rig to the stage, triggering a series of eruptions. Pow, pow, pow! None other than Bubba Ray and Devon Dudley head out to the stage, looking to be in the best shape of their lives despite being in their forties. They're not in full Dudley Boyz mode, but have a little urban camo twist to their current gear.

Bubba: "Oh, you ain't scared? Well you should be. Do you know who we are? I said do - you - know - who - we - are?! We the frickin' Dudley Boyz, and beating punks like you is what we do. We're 24-time tag team champions, and you know what that means for you? It means those belts you're holding are our 25th."
Haas: "Are you gonna stand there runnin' your mouth, or are you gonna come down here and do what you say you're gonna do?"
Bubba: "Oh, oh you don't want to test me, boy. You're lucky that we're the megastars that we are, because we ain't workin' for free. We'll take those belts from ya, but we do that on pay per view."
Benjamin: "So what are you doing out here? Either come down and challenge us like men, or get the hell out of here!"
Bubba: "You just said that? You just said that to us? Really? Devon, you gonna let them say that to you?"

Devon snarls and shakes his head a little. Both Dudleyz start stomping down towards the ring, but at the foot of the ramp Bubba holds Devon back and they backtrack to the stage.

Bubba: "Haha! You thought we were gonna get in there, didn't ya?! You should have seen the looks on your faces! No, we'll get in there and embarrass you at Chaos, when the gold is on the line. Until then, just keep them warm for us."
Devon: "Oh mah brotha, testify!"

Haas and Benjamin aren't impressed by the Dudleyz so far, wanting actions instead of threats. But the match is set, we'll get this settled in three weeks.

Backstage in his interview area, Jeremy Borash is standing with the de facto leader of the IFW chicky-babes, Gail Kim.

JB: "Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time is Gail Kim. Gail, we go back a long way and I don't ever recall seeing you in a situation quite like the one you're in right now."
Gail: "No JB. This isn't anything I've faced before, I don't think this is anything any womens division has faced before. Back when this all began, I was Beth Phoenix's partner in her Phi Nu Xi sorority, and when the Nexettes took her out, I had to take the reigns. I'm doing this for Beth."
JB: "Control of the IFW womens championship has fallen to the Nexettes leader, AJ Lee. With the numbers in their favour, how do you intend to recapture the gold?"
Gail: "I'm glad you asked JB. You're right, there's only me, Brie and Layla left, and there are six of them. I don't know how we're going to pull this off, but we have to do something and our only option is to go all out. So AJ, if you're watching, I'm challenging you to a match at Chaos. You defend your title against one of the IFW divas."

Conveniently, AJ is nearby and comes over to check out the situation.

AJ: "Are you sure you want to do that, Gail? You haven't learned a thing. I'll make you a deal, ok? You can have your match, but only if one of your girls can beat one of my girls tonight."
Gail: "One on one?"
AJ: "One on one."
Gail: "No interference?"
AJ: "As if we would interfere."
JB: "Woah woah woah, hold on there Gail. Every time one of the IFW women has stepped foot in the ring with the Nexettes, they've been put on the shelf. Are you sure you want to do this?"
AJ: "This has nothing to do with you JB. But since you asked, if she doesn't agree, that's fine! I'll choose one of my Nexettes to defend my title against instead."
Gail: "Don't worry JB, I've got this. You're on AJ. I'll see you out there."

Gail leaves, AJ does her crazy smile.

Back to the ring for the first match of the night! JTG is already out, standing on the turnbuckles brapping his gun fingers at the fans. New music hits and apparently it's time for another debut! Big E Langston heads out, wearing a plain black singlet instead of the ridiculous Nation of Domination one he has on Raw. He looks serious, and wastes no time getting to the ring to lay a beating on his prey.

Match 1 - Big E Langston v JTG:
- JTG says something to Langston but gets flattened by a huge lariat, then stomped into the canvas. This looks to be enough to put him down, but Langston drags him back to his feet and delivers the big ending to put JTG away. Done.
Winner: Big E Langston

Langston holds the cover for an imaginary five count, just to prove that he can, then stands up still emotionless. Looks like we have a new monster in IFW.

We head backstage to Vince McMahon's office now, where John Morrison is banging on the door. He gets his reply and heads inside.

McMahon: "John Morrison. What can I do for you?"
Morrison: "You know what. You can't let this wish crap stand. Take my case from London and give it back to me."
McMahon: "I wish I could John, I know how much that case meant to you. But quite frankly what London said is true, Shawn left him that wish and it allows him to make one demand for anything in my power."
Morrison: "So it's in your power to take it back!"
McMahon: "You know it doesn't work that way."
Morrison: "Then at least give me London, tonight."
McMahon: "I'm one step ahead of you, John! London is busy tonight in our main event, trying to win back his silver title. So what I've done for you is give you a number one contenders match, so that if you win and if London wins, you get him at Chaos."
Morrison: "...fine. Who am I beating?"
McMahon: "Someone else who came in here making demands earlier tonight. D'Angelo Dinero. And John, after what Dinero wished for, don't be afraid to lay it in a little."

Morrison rolls his eyes, not wanting to deal with Dinero. But he grunts in acceptance and leaves Vince to his paperwork.

Back to the arena now, where the Nexettes are invading the ringside area. AJ gets into the ring with a microphone.

AJ: "Ok Gail, here we are. Come on out, it's your turn."

Gail Kim's music hits and the leader of the IFW women comes out to the stage with Layla and Brie Bella.

Gail: "My turn, AJ? I don't think so."
AJ: "No? Then you don't get your title shot."
Gail: "What we agreed on, champ, is that one of my girls takes on one of your girls. I didn't say it would be me."
AJ: "Details. So which one is it? Layla's about old enough to retire, right? Or do we put Brie in the hospital bed next to her sister?"
Gail: "Or maybe there's another option?"

AJ looks a little nervous.

AJ: "Oh yeah? And what is that?"
Gail: "You first."

AJ rolls her eyes. She looks around the ring at her comerades and finally selects...Aksana.

AJ: "You. Get in here."
Gail: "Good choice. It's such a shame she's going to lose."
AJ: "I wouldn't be so sure of that. Come on Gail, who have you got?"
Gail: "It's not who I've got, AJ, it's who you haven't."

AJ looks confused, until a figure looms over her back. She turns around and finds her own fellow Nexette, Naomi Knight, standing over her.

AJ: "No! Naomi, no. You don't want to do this."

Naomi nods and smiles, yes she does.

AJ: "What has she offered you? Why are you doing this?"
Gail: "I can answer that one. If she wins tonight, I get to name the contender, right? Well if...when, Naomi wins, she gets you."
AJ: "Come on Naomi, we can talk about this. You lay down tonight, and I get to name the contender. I'll choose you myself!"
Gail: "And then what, AJ? You tell her to lay down at Chaos too? GIve it up, Naomi's seen the light. You're out for yourself, you're never going to let any of your girls have a shot at your title."
AJ: "That's not true! Naomi, let's just talk about this, ok?"

Naomi shakes her head.

Gail: "Oh, and one more thing AJ. We agreed to make this no interference. You do know what a 'no interference' match means in IFW, right?"

AJ stares back as if she has no idea. She thought she was just making an empty promise.

Gail: "It means if any of your girls interfere, they get fired on the spot."
AJ: "That's a thing?! Aaaaagh!"

Match 2 - Aksana v Naomi Knight:
Number one contendership to the womens title
- AJ and the remaining Nexettes have to back away from the ring for the sake of their jobs, while Naomi goes to work on Aksana. They match each other for power early on, with the former bodybuilder Aksana narrowly gaining an advantage, but Naomi easily overcomes her when the match gets more technical. Naomi scores the victory with the Knightfall neckbreaker.
Winner: Naomi Knight (new number one contender)

As soon as the match is over AJ orders her girls to storm the ring and attack the traitor, but Gail, Layla and Brie all rush down for the save. The Nexettes bail and are forced to retreat, which makes AJ scream in frustration.

Backstage, Rosa Mendes is looking a little lost without Los Colóns around, so she's spending this week just working out a little. She's just done with her skipping rope and has switched to a shakeweight. Lurking in the background is Hunico, who waves for Camacho to join him. They both watch Rosa shaking for a bit before approaching her.

Hunico: "Ey mama, lookin' good! Maybe you could work that move on me sometime."
Rosa: "Ugh. What do you want, ese?"
Hunico: "I think you know exactly what I want. I want some of that-!"

Hunico tries to grab Rosa's ass, but she slaps his hand away and then gives him a vicious slap across his face too.

Hunico: "Eh ha ha. Mamacita got some latin fire, homes! Yeah, I like that!"
Rosa: "Get out of here now, Hunico. Or Primo and Epico won't be happy when they get back next week."

Hunico and Camacho laugh at the threat.

Hunico: "You hear that, Camacho? Los Colóns won't be happy with us."
Camacho: "I'm scared."
Hunico: "Oh me too homes, I'm frightened! Maybe we should back off, eh?"
Rosa: "Yeah, maybe you should."

Hunico slams his hands against the wall either side of Rosa's head, trapping her.

Hunico: "Or maybe you should deliver a little message for us. Tell your boys that we can do this the easy way or the hard way, but in the end Hunico will get what Hunico wants."

Hunico puts his hand on Rosa's face, gently at first but then smears her lipstick with his thumb as he turns away. She's left kinda shaken, but has half a smile too.

Back to the arena! John Morrison comes out, not bothering to do his slow motion entrance as he's focused only on finding a way to get his MITB case back. He's joined in the ring by D'Angelo Dinero, who has been on a roll lately. Dinero is confident and in contract to Morrison spends extra time making his grand entrance through the Dinero dollaz. Morrison is already getting restless.

Match 3 - John Morison v D'Angelo Dinero:
Number one contendership to the silver title
- Morrison and Dinero go back and forth from the start, neither one wanting to waste time feeling each other out. The match is hard-hitting as each man has something to prove, in prime positions to take a step up the IFW ladder. Morrison brings more aggression than usual, which is good early on when he catches Dinero off-guard and can grind him into the mat with his amateur ability. Morrison sets up for the starship pain, but Dinero shoves him off-balance into the turnbuckle and pulls him into a tree of woe, then connects with the DDE. Morrison falls into the ring but kicks out at two. Morrison regains control of the match by countering the Elijah experience into the moonlight drive, and scores a near fall of his own with the flying Chuck. Morrison is getting more and more frustrated that Dinero isn't staying down, to the point where his judgement is clouded and he tries to trade punches with Dinero, who is a former amateur boxer. A good one. Morrison ends up walking into the 4-up, which busts his lip and leaves him open for a second DDE. Dinero rolls him up for the three count.
Winner: D'Angelo Dinero (new number one contender)

Dinero's hand is raised and he heads back up the ramp victorious. Morrison stays on his back the whole time, hands on his head in dispair that he's lost Melina to injury, his title shot and now, because he lost his compsure, even his chance of a match with London.

Another vignette for Austin Aries plays, similar to the one from last week. Aries is in a black room, the camera rotates around him showing his 'Greatest Man That Ever Lived' cape, and stops when it reaches his face.

Aries: "The greatest man that ever lived is coming back to IFW. The Era of A-Double begins again, next week."

When we come back, we're still in the arena and Randy Orton's music starts up. He's not dressed to compete, and by that I mean he's in full ring gear but also has a t-shirt. That's street clothes for Randy Orton. He gets to the ring and takes a mic.

Orton: "Happy, Flair? You got your big main event out of me last week, teaming up with Angle against the tag champions. Now I've got that out the way, I'm not going to waste another week. Kurt, come out here and accept my challenge for a rematch."

Instead of Angle's music, Cult Of Personality hits and CM Punk heads out to the stage. He slowly walks down to the ring as he talks.

Punk: "Sorry Randal, that's not gonna happen. I thought I made it quite clear, nobody is getting a title shot before me."
Orton: "I don't have to explain anything to you, Punk, but you saw what happened during my match two weeks ago."
Punk: "Yeah? And how is that my problem? You saw what happened during my match five weeks ago."
Orton: "What are you talking about?"
Punk: "You forgot? I beat Kurt Angle! Clean, in the middle! I sure as hell hope Ric Flair isn't as ignorant as you."

Punk ducks under the ropes and gets into Orton's face. The two argue back and forth a little until John Cena shows up. He looks around the arena, says something to the stage cameraman and sprints down to the ring.

Punk: "No! John, I've told you over and over, you do not cut this line!"
Cena: "Lively crowd we got here tonight!"
Punk: "John! Listen to me! You do not get away with your WWE schtick here!"
Cena: "From the guy up there telling me I suck to the chick over there wearing my t-shirt, we getting things popping up in heeee-yuh!"
Punk: "John! Stop it! No one likes this thing you do!"
Cena: "And by the way miss, they do sell those shirts in adult sizes. Not that I'm complaining."
Punk: "Seriously! Cena, shut the hell up! You're not funny!"
Cena: "Like I always say, even if 90% of the people here tonight are booing me out of the building, I'm going to do this for the 10% who stand behind me. You guys mean everything to me and I will become IFW champion for each one of you."
Punk: "Is my mic off? Can you not hear me?"
Cena: "Yes Punk, we can all hear you! We're just ignoring you because no one cares what you have to say!"
Punk: "Seriously? Can you hear these people? Listen carefully. I hate each and every one of you! You're all idiots! I am better than you!"
Cena: "What's your point, Punk?"
Punk: "My point, John, is that I can say this and they still like me more than you! You're old, John! You're stale! No one cares!"
Cena: "Punk, look-"
Orton: "No, you look Cena. I don't like Punk any more than you do, but he's absolutely right. You don't belong here. Hell, I'm not even sure I belong here! This isn't WWE, we aren't automatically the golden boys anymore. We don't get to come out here and do bad comedy every night and expect to be given the title shots and the big matches here. John, This is between me and Punk, just go away."
Punk: "You heard him. Go away."

Cena gets his serious face on, looks down a little and sighs. He's doing his best to look sad, but it's really obvious he's going to do the Cena thing.

Cena: "Alright. Maybe I have to accept that this isn't WWE. Maybe I should go."

Cena walks to the ropes and steps through, but pauses and turns back.

Cena: "Or maybe I should throw my hat into the ring too, because I don't care if I'm handed the shot or if I have to jump through every hoop they put in front of me! I will beat you, Punk, and you, Orton, and anybody else I have to beat to get to Kurt Angle! I'm not asking to be given anything for free, I still know how to get my hands dirty, and that's exactly what I'm gonna do! I always say if you want some, come get some, and I - want - some!"

Ugh. Fortunately before he can go on any more, IFW champion Kurt Angle comes out to the stage.

Angle: "So, these are my options, huh? I got Cena, Orton or Punk. I gotta admit, I feel pretty good to be the target of such big names. I must be doing something right."
Punk: "Cut the crap, Angle. I beat you five weeks ago, I earned my shot."
Orton: "Our match was interrupted, I didn't get my fair shot!"
Punk: "Fair? What's fair about you getting a shot before me?!"
Angle: "Guys, please. Cena, what about you?"
Punk: "Him?! He hasn't even worked a match here!"
Cena: "I got nothing, Kurt. Punk's right, I haven't earned a shot, I don't deserve any more than these guys do. But I came to IFW to win that championship and that's not gonna happen if I just sit around backstage doing nothing."
Angle: "I appreciate your honesty John, but honesty doesn't get you title shots. But since we're being honest, let me tell you guys something. Right now, I couldn't give a damn which one of you I get. Hell, I don't want any of you! I hold this belt with pride, I work my ass off to prove that I deserve this honour every week I come out here. When I defend my IFW title, nothing else in the world matters. So when I'm half way through beating another great wrestler who I respect greatly, like Randy Orton, and I get attacked? That pisses me off. No, that offends me. That spits on everything I've worked my whole life for. So right now I don't want any of you guys, I want the Shield."

Vince McMahon's music hits and the chairman himself swaggers out to the stage and stands next to Kurt.

McMahon: "Well, this is quite the situation we have here. First of all let me offer my sincere condolences to Ric Flair and his family during this difficult time. I've allowed Ric to take as much time as he needs, and that puts me into the awkward position of choosing just where the four of you go from here. Kurt, as much as I'd like to put you into a match with the Shield, every pay per view needs a world title match main event and that is your responsibility, your duty, as champion. To not showcase your championship truly would be spitting on your life's work, and that is not something I'm willing to do."

Angle respectfully accepts Vince's ruling.

McMahon: "Which means I have to choose your opponent. Cena, you know I respect your work ethic and your drive to be the best. If title shots were given to the hardest working man in the company, I may well have to give it to you. But that's not how things work anymore, and so I have to decline your request for a shot."

Cena also accepts the ruling.

McMahon: "Randy, I agree that the interference during your last title shot was unfair and that you do deserve a rematch, but that time is not now."
Punk: "Yes! Vince, for once in your life you've done the right thing. You won't regret this."
McMahon: "I'm already starting to. Punk, you did defeat Angle five weeks ago, and so I have to declare you the rightful contender. Congratulations."
Punk: "That's all you had to say. John, Randal."

Punk bows a little to his rivals before leaving the ring. He heads back up the ramp and glares at Kurt as he passes him.

McMahon: "But stay there you two. Randy, I didn't just give Punk the shot because he beat Kurt. I also gave him the shot because it was you and Kurt who were attacked by the Shield two weeks ago and while I can't put Kurt on the front line, you don't have other duties. I want you to lead a three man team against the Shield at Chaos."
Cena: "Mr McMahon, if you need me, I'll be there."
McMahon: "I had assumed as much. Well, the decision is yours Randy. I know you'll make the right choice."

Orton and Cena share a tense moment, but they shake hands to confirm their alliance.

McMahon: "Gentlemen, good luck."

Angle is happy, Orton and Cena are happy, Punk is very happy...great! Vince leaves, everyone else has a goal.

JR: "Well folks, Chaos is shaping up to be a hell of a show!"
Taz: "No doubt, no doubt!"
JR: "We've just been informed that IFW champion Kurt Angle will be defending against CM Punk."
Taz: "Punk has scored the upset against the champ before, but can he make it two for two? My money's on my man Kurt."
JR: "Also just announced, Vince McMahon has booked the Shield against a team captained by Randy Orton. Orton has chosen John Cena to be one of his allies, but who will fill the final spot?"
Taz: "If I was a few years younger, JR!"
JR: "Then what?"
Taz: "Well...I still wouldn't take the match. Move on!"
JR: "Womens champion AJ Lee will be taking on former Nexette Naomi Knight for the title."
Taz: "Naomi knows AJ better than anyone, will this be the kick start IFW needs to fight back against the Nexettes?"
JR: "Our tag team champions, Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin, have accepted the challenge of the legendary Dudley Boyz."
Taz: "I go way back with the Dudleyz man. If you ask me, we got ourselves some new champions come Chaos."
JR: "And that just leaves the silver championship. Earlier tonight the Black Pope, D'Angelo Dinero defeated John Morrison to earn himself a shot at the title, but who will be holding the belt?"
Taz: "Will it be Ezekiel Jackson or Paul London? Let's find out JR!"

Indeed it's time for the main event. Paul London is out first, sprinting down the ramp with the MITB case and sliding across the canvas. He hands his case to the referee and uses the ropes to limber up. New champion Ezekiel Jackson is next out, looking all business with the belt over his shoulder. He reaches the ring, hands the belt over to the referee and gives the old flex 'n' yell.

Match 4 - Paul London v Ezekiel Jackson:
Silver championship
- Much like their other match, London tries to use his speed advantage to hit and run. He wears out Jackson's leg with kicks but soon gets caught and slammed. Jackson goes to work on the cruiserweight, using simple but effective moves to take him out. Jackson tries to put the match away with the book of Ezekiel, but London flips around the back and kicks at his knee from behind, taking the big man down, then hops to the middle turnbuckle and nails the mushroom stomp to the upper back. London covers for two, but Jackson powers out.
London rolls to the apron and springboards into a crossbody, which Jackson catches and transitions into a torture rack. London struggles against the hold and looks set to tap at one point, but manages to spin out into a hurricanrana that sends the champ into the turnbuckles. London hits a dropkick to Jackson's back, crushing him in the corner, then pulls him down to the mat to set up the shooting star. London heads to the top and leaps off, Jackson rolls away and London manages to land on his feet. London hits the ropes and charges back at the big man, who is ready for him and turns him inside out with a big clothesline. London is out of it, falling victim to the book of Ezekiel and another pinfall.
Winner: Ezekiel Jackson (retains silver championship)

Jackson stands victorious, but the referee can't hand him his belt because it's been stolen by...Brian Kendrick? Kendrick rolls into the ring and holds the belt up while circling Jackson, raising his arm and acting even more excited than the champion himself. Jackson tries to take the belt, but Kendrick runs away and celebrates on a turnbuckle. Every time Jackson goes to grab his belt, Kendrick moves away and celebrates somewhere else as if he'd won the belt. He tries to leave the ring, but Jackson grabs him by the shoulder and drags him back, ordering him to strap the belt around his waist. Kendrick obliges as if there's no problem, but once it's on he takes a lot of care in brushing dust off the belt and rubbing it a bit to make it shine. Jackson notices David Otunga yet again watching him from the stage. The show ends on a shot of Jackson and Kendrick celebrating with the silver title, the longest undefeated streak in the game getting one match longer.